Volume XIII
Issue 7
July 2010

 

Copyright © 1998-2010
The Globe-Guardian
All Rights Reserved
ISSN: 1525-6316

We thought that the questions currently being used on ABC's "Who Wants To Be a Millionaire?" are far too difficult to give the average player a reasonable chance at winning the top prize. They are also taxing the minds of home viewers to the limit, making them feel stupid, frustrated and angry. That's bad for ratings, which is bad for ABC. And that, my friends, is bad for America.

In an effort to alleviate this problem, we have prepared a set of questions we propose for the show. We invite you to take the test. Of course, your prize will be a whole lot of nothing, but it will be good practice in your quest to become an actual contestant on the real show. We don't want to set you up to fail, so here's a hint: always pick "D."  In case you are still not quite clear on how to make your selections, we have included other visual clues to guide you. Good luck.

Million Dollar Questions

button.gif (969 bytes)  $100    Who are you?
A. Him    B. Her    C. You    D. Me

button.gif (969 bytes)  $200    Who am I?
A. Him    B. Her    C. Me    D. You

button.gif (969 bytes)  $300    Where do you live?
A. Here    B. There    C. Everywhere    D. Home

button.gif (969 bytes)  $500    When you fall, you go in what direction?
A. Left    B. Right    C.  Up    D. Down

button.gif (969 bytes)  $1,000    What are you are doing when you are "breathing in"?
A. Shouting    B. Sweating    C. Exhaling   D. Inhaling

button.gif (969 bytes)  $2,000    What is another name for "pancake"?
A.  Tire Jack B. Crackerjack    C. Just Jack    D. Flapjack

button.gif (969 bytes)  $4,000    The airline industry is based on what mode of transportation?
A. Air Duct   B. Air Conditioner    C. Air Pump    D. Airplane

button.gif (969 bytes)  $8,000    New York City is located in what state?
A.  Newfoundland    B. New Caledonia   C.  New Zealand   D. New York

button.gif (969 bytes)  $16,000    What are those fluffy looking things in the sky called?
A. Cloths    B. Clowns    C. Clods    D. Clouds

button.gif (969 bytes)  $32,000    What device can be most easily used to remotely control channels on your television set?
A. Hammer    B. Tuning Fork    C. Vibrator    D. Remote Control

button.gif (969 bytes)  $64,000    What occupation is most likely to involve a fire hose?
A. Librarian    B. Guidance Counselor     C. Prostitute    D. Firefighter

button.gif (969 bytes)  $125,000    Humans and potatoes have what body parts in common?
A.  Ears   B.  Lips  C. Ribs    D. Eyes

button.gif (969 bytes)  $250,000    What is the main component of sea water?
A. Sharks    B. Salt    C. Vitamin C    D. Water

button.gif (969 bytes)  $500,000    What current television game show features the most obnoxious master of ceremonies?
A. Family Feud    B. The Price is Right    C. Wheel of Fortune    D. Who Wants To Be a Millionaire?

button.gif (969 bytes)  $1 MILLION   Do you really want to be a millionaire?
A. No   B.  Maybe   C.  Not Sure   D. Yes

OK, maybe that was still a little tough. Here are the correct answers:
$100 D    $200 D    $300 D    $500 D    $1,000 D    $2,000 D    $4,000 D $8,000 D    $16,000 D
$32,000 D    $64,000 D    $125,000 D    $250,000 D    $500,000 D    $1 Million D


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