Volume XIII
Issue 7
July 2010

 

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ISSN: 1525-6316

Mixed Messages
Question: I'm just an average American citizen trying to follow President Bush's advice to lead my life normally. How can I do that when every time I turn on the TV or open a newspaper, the top story is the latest Anthrax mail delivery or FBI nationwide law enforcement "high alert"?
Answer: A defensive question. Clearly, you must choose a middle road between life as you knew it before Sept. 11, 2001, and life as it exists today. One one hand, you should take whatever news you get with a grain of salt, remembering that the primary business of the media is to provide eyes for advertisers. What the media seem to ignore is that, by extensively reporting situations which pose a minimal threat to the population at large, they are also playing into the hands of those who seek to terrorize us. On the other hand, you probably should wear a hazmat suit whenever you go to your mailbox, especially if you are a national media or political figure, bring a parachute as carryon luggage whenever you fly, and stay on the ground floor of any high-rise buildings you absolutely need to enter -- just to be sure.

Oh, Fudge!
Q: I'm wondering if you could answer a quick question to settle a bet between my wife and myself. I came in the other day and asked my kids "What the Sam Hill are you doing"? She said I was saying it wrong, and it should be said "What the Sam Hell are you doing"? That's were the bet lies -- is it Hell or Hill? If you could help that would be great.
A:
An euphemistic question. Tell your wife to pay up. Your usage was correct. The term harkens to a more polite society of yesteryear when people tended to substitute similar sounding words for expletives in situations requiring delicacy, such as (ahem) addressing children. One historian traces the origin of the saying to a genuine Sam Hill, the man behind the Washington State Good Roads Association in 1901. A hard-surfaced road running from the Mexican to Canadian borders along the Pacific Coast at the turn of the century? What the Sam Hill was this man thinking?

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